sweet pickle...

Things are going pretty well with my pickle...aka my chemical romance. He makes me happy. I really enjoy his company. He is sexy, he is funny, he is smart, he is attentive, he is chill, and he is very complimenting of me. also, he does what he needs to do to make me happy. Oddly enough, I am feeling strangely close to him. This does not happen often; I don't think I like him like him...yet, but I feel very connected like he is someone I am supposed to be with right now.


I do have some secrets that I would rather never bring to the surface as long as I live, but some things are coming up that need to be addressed with us. I will tell him a bit about me and hope he stays since he is a lovely companion right now.


Still, I think about HAP and Sweet Daddy all the time. I wish I could keep all three forever. It sucks that Hap is married, and I still feel very deceived by him. He was very very clickable.  It is weird going from talking to someone literally every day and night to nothing, And when I saw him...instant BT's (beaver tingles)...he is hot. And again, fun, and interesting. In fact, the three are so much alike...it is hard to separate any differences. I want them all for myself forever...that would be lovely...selfish me.


Sweet Daddy is still my number one, but it is hard with him so far away. He is jealous, but tells me he knows I can't just wait for him. Still, I would. Or maybe I wouldn't. I don't know, could I give up pickle now? Or, the want to be with HAP?  I never considered myself a homewrecker, but why can't I have what I want? I am always sitting back and watching everyone else get theirs...I want mine!


We'll see how this goes...


to be continued - song for the day - crown of love by arcade fire.