Back in the Saddle Again...

So, I am still running...however, have been a little distracted lately. I am back on track and doing well...motivation...check, importance...check, determination...check. My goal is still 30 lbs by my birthday, but 20 lbs may be more likely. Still, I am determined to continue getting into shape.


Reason, I feel great when I am lighter. Reason, I am actually starting to feel sexy. Reason, I have someone who thinks I am sexy now - I can't wait until I blow his mind. Reason, my relationship is much more productive and enjoyable with my chemical romace (hello stamina). He recently said he wanted to get in shape so he feels better and has more energy. Really, I love his body right now and think he is far from lazy...but, if it will make him happy - I am all for it. Just hope he doesn't think it matters to me.


I am kind of coming down off of my cloud right now and starting to feel tired (yawn). I want to just go home and lay in bed, think of my night and morning, smile, and sleep...but, instead I will run, shower, then lay in bed, think of my night and morning, smile, and sleep (oh, I will likely watch family guy before my slumber).


I had a great night as usual with my chemical romance. Always laughing and happy and excited! I love how I get random "shhhh's", "shut your mouth, right now's", "it's time to sleep, right now's", and other sarcastic hostilities thrown at me :-)  Quite hilarious. I gave him a gift that I had made by a friend...worried that he would think I was getting attached. Luckilly, he was very happy with it said he would put it up - whew, huge sigh of relief. I really can't be more clear about the fact I don't want our situation to change. He makes me feel liberated and freaky (the kind that is hot), but I am just a caring person who likes to do nice things for people.


I look forward to my E & D time, and hope I can keep this one for awhile...biting nails thinking about N coming home soon. Also, the invite for me to go see him next month. Initially, I was comparing D to N...now because D and I are so matched in terms of chemistry...I worry I will now use him as the comparison with N. How did I get here...and why did it take a freak show with D to get Nathan to tell me how he felt sick to know I am seeing someone else instead of him...?  Boys are drama too - and not just the gay ones!


E vil is my new favorite song...